I was trying to do some banking on the computer when I overheard Ryan creating a racket in the kitchen. By the sound of the noise, I could tell he wasn't getting into anything harmful. I also knew from the type of ruckus he was causing that it was the kind he usually makes when he's in the process of doing a BM. I won't get into the particulars, but he has a habit of getting hyper and crashing the blinds around as part of his routine. So, I waited for things to mellow down (and for the smell to waft over, so I knew for sure he needed a change) before I went to check on him.
I walked into the kitchen to get him, but he wasn't there, so I headed down the hall and into his room. He was standing over by the bed, playing with a toy. I went to take his hand and bring him for a diaper change when I saw THIS:
"Uggh, RYAN BITS!" I groaned. (Nothing new there, but it's still gross. Occasionally, Ryan's little BM pebbles escape his diaper and end up on the floor. We've nicknamed them "Ryan Bits.") Anyhow, I made note of the bits and went to grab Ryan's hand to lead him to the bathroom when I spotted his fingers. They had brown smeared all over them. Double ewwww! But again, we've dealt with this before. Once in a while, he gets his hands into his diaper or the bits. So, I took a breath (not too deep: he's pungent) and reached for the wipes to do an emergency hand clean-up.
That's when I noticed his MOUTH.
O-M-G. Now I was losing my cool.
"Ryan, that is so freaking gross! Let me see your mouth! Ack! Yucky!"
Meanwhile, Ryan was laughing like this was the funniest thing ever, and trying to run away from me. As he darted to the opposite corner of the room, I saw THIS:
Wait a second . . . Wait a second . . . Is it? Please, let it be . . .
CHOCOLATE!
Ryan has stolen a Hershey's bar out of Kevin's candy bag, chewed it open, and spit out chunks of chocolate all over the place . . . I think.
I'm still not sure. It looks an awful lot like Ryan Bits! And, he does have a BM in his diaper. Hmm . . .
Sniff check time!
Mouth/Breath: Chocolate.
Hands: Chocolate.
Stuff on Carpet: Chocolate.
Stuff in Diaper? Well, that's a BM. I'd be worried if that was chocolate!
***
After everything was sorted out, I had to laugh at myself. And at the situation. Can you say "comedic timing"? What are the chances that Ryan would have a BM and scatter little bits of chocolate all over the place at the same time? It still can't get over how much they looked like Ryan Bits and how it all came together. Knowing Ryan's history, you wouldn't blame me for my confusion! ;)
This kid. He always keeps me guessing! :D
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